Trying for a baby and a history that now included two losses
didn’t come without regular appointments at the hospital.
We were under the care of Basingstoke Hospital. I can’t fault
the incredible staff there. They have been so sensitive, supportive and the
care we have received has been brilliant. We are extremely lucky to have a
National Health Service.
After the second pregnancy loss we were fast tracked to see
a Fertility Consultant. Under normal circumstances you would be required to wait
until a year had passed without a conception before being referred but I understand that
this can vary all over the UK and can vary depending on your age. We met with a fertility consultant and we
would now undergo a series of hospital tests.
You’re still so young,
people would say, you have ages to start a family, just enjoy life.
Was I too young? What did that have to do with anything? We
were married, in love and wanted a baby. The age we decided to start a family
would be our choice and was no business of anyone else.
Your time will come
and everything will be OK.
Will it? Can you guarantee that for me? I would think. If
only I could just see a glimmer of my life in the future. If I just knew that
one day I would get to hold our healthy baby in my arms it would make this
journey so much easier. There would be a light at the end of the tunnel but the
tunnel felt long, dark and lonely.
I was booked in for a scan. This would check my womb, left fallopian
tube and look for cysts on my ovaries. I would have a blood test on day 1-5 of
my cycle, and then day 21. This was to look at my hormone levels and ovulation.
It would be repeated for 3 cycles. I was also booked in for HSG (hysterosalpingogram).
This is an x-ray test that would check my remaining tube was not blocked and that
the shape and structure of everything looked normal. It involved a dye inserted
into my vagina while under x-ray so that the flow could be seen. I spent all
evening crying following that test... Why had ‘baby making’ become so medical,
embarrassing, uncomfortable and scary.
I was often told to relax, it would happen if I stopped
worrying and thinking about it. This used to really frustrate me. How was I
supposed to stop worrying and thinking about it when I was so regularly being
seen by the hospital? I was adamant they would find something wrong, at least
that would give me the answers I was looking for and a reason for having lost two
babies. However everything was fine, all my test results were normal.
Andrew also underwent a sperm test. We lived too far from
the hospital for him to be allowed to provide a sample at home so I attended
his appointment with him. Nervously we sat in the corridor just down from the
fertility department. I was a little giggly, I couldn’t help it. I think a tiny
element of it was nerves but I am human and I did find it a little funny. For
once the pressure of this test wasn’t on me.
A lady in a white lab coat walked out into the corridor ‘Mr
Reed?, he stood. Pulling her latex glove on over her fingers with an exaggerated
ping she turned to me ‘Would you like to go in with him?’, I shook my head, ‘Andrew,
would you like some materials?’, he shook his head. CRINGE. My lips and cheeks
went so tight I thought I was going to burst with laughter. She opened the door
to a small room, in the room a chair sat centrally alone. She handed Andrew a
sample bottle as he entered and he closed the door and did what he needed to do.
All tests complete we were booked back in with the Fertility
Consultant. This appointment was scheduled for January 2015.
Another New Year was here.
At our appointment the test results were discussed and I was
prescribed a tablet called Clomid. I would take this tablet for 5 days at the
start of my next cycle. This tablet would increase my chances of ovulation and
therefore our chances of conceiving. Like most tablets it came with side
effects and like most fertility treatment a risk of a multiple pregnancy. I
would have blood tests through the cycle to monitor the effects.
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